Friday, July 13, 2012

Pumping. Pumping. Pumping.

Seeing that I have been attached to a breast pump for the last 64 days, I thought I should write a post about it, as I frequently complain about how its "Time to pump.  Again."  This isn't graphic, just honest.  

WARNING:  I WILL BE TALKING ABOUT MY BOOBS.  AND NIPPLES.  IF THAT IS TOO MUCH INFO FOR YOU, JUST SKIP TO THE NEXT POST WITH PHOTOS OF SWEET BABY!

Valentina was born 66 days ago, and I didn't start pumping until about two days after, as I was in recovery for a day, and was a basket-case and totally out of it the following day...  I am estimating I started pumping two days after she was born, but my *Official Records* start May 13th.

So I missed out on most of pregnancy.  Or at least the parts that really count.  The big belly.  The kicks.  Peeing 19234098345 times a day.  The popped bellybutton.  The pickles and ice cream cravings.  Being super hot.  Oh.  And giving birth.  I didn't get to experience any of that.  I am determined to breast feed.  No. Matter. What.

So, I have spent the last 64 days squeezing my boobs.  Obsessing about boobs.  Writing down every last drop.  Chugging water.  Vitamins.  Sterilizing.  It is recommended that you pump every two hours.  Or three hours.  Or four hours.  The MAX is five hours.  Naturally, as this felt like THE ONLY thing in the UNIVERSE I could do for Valentina (especially in those first few weeks when I was hysterical ALL the time), I took on this endeavor with such obsessive precision that I must first apologize to ALL family and friends who have breasts, children, know anyone who has children and/ or breasts.  I AM SORRY.  THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE. . . 

So here is what I have learned...   

(Keep in mind that I have not yet breast-fed my baby, as she is still too small, but hopefully in the next week we will start!!!  This is just my personal experiences in the last two months.)
  • It really won't hurt after the first few days.  
  • If milk is still coming out, keep pumping.  I have pumped for an hour straight in the first few weeks (and after!) and while my butt hurt from sitting so long, my breasts no longer felt heavy, hard and sore.  And they leak.  After a good pump, I don't have any leaking.  
  • I can tell time by my boobs.  All of a sudden, I get a .05 second PING! of "pain" right in the center of my nipples.  I look at my watch, and sure enough, it is time to pump.  Again.  And then the alarm on my phone goes off.  I can truly tell time with my cans.... HA!!!  I say "pain" as it isn't experienced long enough to call pain, but its definitely a PING!

When I was still in the hospital, I was using the Medela Symphony hospital grade pump.  I would use the sterilized kits provided from the hospital and the sterilized glass bottle.  If I had endless $$, I would spend the $1,500 on the hospital grade Medela pump.  It is epic.

Medela Symphony Hospital Grade Breast Pump.
If you have a preemie in the hospital, or if you will be a working/ pumping mama
GET THIS.  It is worth every penny.  
  • The first few days, you may not get ANYTHING!  I was thrilled when I had my first little drips of milk, called colostrum.  After just one week, I was pumping more than 100 ml of milk.
  • The first milk is the most IMPORTANT LIQUID GOLD!  (Read the link above!)  
My colostrum was nice and thick, like cream.  It was actually a nice pale yellow,which is great!  But there are some Mamas who's colostrum is almost orange.  WOAH.  That shizzah is like. WOAH. (Maybe their babies were full-term?  I felt very competitive about my milk not being GOLD enough. HAha)
  • In the hospital, I pumped each breast for 20 minutes, every two to three hours.  
  • Now that I am home, I TRY to pump each breast 20- 30 minutes, every three to four hours, depending on what's going on in life.    
  • If you don't pump often enough, you will be in PAIN.  Or you will ruin your favorite shirt.  And your bed sheets.  And all of your pajamas.  
  • Even if your baby is in the NICU and is too little to drink any/ all of your milk, SAVE it.  FREEZE IT.  DON'T DUMP IT.  
Especially the first two weeks milk!  This is the liquid gold for your baby, with endless health benefits that only you and your body can provide.  I see Mamas that the NICU parents' room disappear behind the screen to sit and pump.  It feels like they are there for 10 minutes (total) and come out with two baby bottles (about 200 ML) FULL of milk.  And I am there an hour, only to produce two little drips of milk...    
  • I think I have a slow milk- letdown reflex.   I've learned, I just have to deal with it.  
 I've read that if you look at photos of your baby, smell baby's shirt, blanket, etc., it can help "teach" you to start milk-squirting sooner.  Especially in the beginning, if I pumped for 10 minutes per breast, I would have little nothing drips, not even my super-tiny-precious-preemie could squeeze some nutrition out of it.  Say, less than 10mL.  If I pumped for 20 minutes, I get a good amount, say 20- 40 mL.  If I pumped for 30 minutes, then I'd get 50 mL!  I didn't have anything Valentina-scented to sniff in the beginning (this made me cry), as she was still to tiny to wear clothes.  The photos of her the first few weeks were painful, not endearing.  No amount of meditation could calm my stress as I was begging the heavens for my baby's survival, let enjoy a moment of peace in which I could produce oodles of  milky goodness.... Give me a break.  I have accepted it.

Maybe when I am breastfeeding with my Vivi attached to said breast (and not my friend, The Pump) it will be different.  I will have to get back to you on this one...  But for now, I know I need MINIMUM of 20 minutes per breast, thus the biggest reason why I bought a second Medela Swing.  I tuck them into my maternity bra, kinda hang the shirt over the top for stability and hold with my left arm, while I attempt to Facebook one-handed.  I bought one of those double-pump bras, but it was too big, so I have to return it.  It technically worked, but it was really giant on me, practically slipping off.  If it fit properly, I would say HELL YEAH.  I may or may not buy another one, in the correct size.  If Vivi starts breastfeeding in the next week I probably won't get another.  But if you think you will be pumping as often as I have been, I recommend that you DEFINITELY buy a second pump and the double pump bra.  You will feel like a cow, and I often MOO to my hubby as a joke... But it will be a life-saver.  And a sanity- saver.  I was so tired one morning that I just whipped out my boobs to pump in front of my cleaning lady.  In hindsight, I really, really wish I had that double pump bra that day...              

Oh yes, here I am, double- pumping, reading a magazine and enjoying my coffee.

Two free hands to blog & Facebook chat!

How I really feel.

MoooOOooOooOooo.........
   
After I got out of the hospital, I didn't have a pump yet.  My sister-in-law Carmen came to my rescue.  Twice.  The day I got out of the hospital, she brought me three different pumps, though none were as lovely and luxurious as the Medela Symphony...  (The hospital grade vs. the home grade really aren't on the same sphere of comparison... BUT more on this in a bit...)  So, we went to the mall and found the next best thing, as my other sister-in-law Ana Filipa recommended, the Medela Swing.  I now have two...  

Medela Swing Home Breast Pump.
I love mine so much, I got two, to save time, and
"just in case."
Also worth-every-penny.
On both.
You will also need:

  • Milk bags.
  • Sterilizing bags.
  • A sharpie.
  • A notebook to write it all down.
  • A subscription to Netflix, Hulu, etc.
  • Batteries/ car charger for your pump.  Traffic happens, and your boobies will thank you. 
  • A very comfortable chair.  (HA!) 
  • Snacks.  And endless bottles of water.
  • Digital timer.  I say digital, as every second that ticks by, you wanna know...
  • Books.  Lots and lots of books.  
  • Ziplock bags, for your supply in the freezer.
  • Those blue freezer cold pack things for transporting your frozen Mamamilk to the hospital.
  • Cold lunchbox, also for traveling to hospital.  

Because I am obsessive, I have a little try for my pump parts to cool/ air dry, after they have sterilized.  I also have a separate sponge to wash with, though I wish I had thought of it sooner than two weeks ago....  After over 6 weeks of using a regular (you know, relatively new) dish sponge, I thought to use a brand new one, JUST for baby.  I guess I am not that obsessed... Or just not that quick thinking..... ?

Medela Pump & Save milk bags.
THEY COME IN 50 packs?!!!
I can only find 20 bags here!!!
BUY in bulk.
Yes you will need ALL of them if you are a pumping mama.

Medela Sterilize Bags.  Five per box, 20 uses each.
Also, can't live without these.  
What else have I learned...
  • Get on a schedule, and don't let ANYONE for any reason change it.  I got into a fight with Victor (dear sweet man, bless his heart for loving me...) because I was allowing myself to get off schedule.
  • You NEED to sleep.  You NEED to eat.  You NEED to pump.  Don't feel guilty for letting anyone or anything get in the way of this.  This is really important.  Just as no one begrudges a pregnant lady for needing any of these things, you are making milk for your preemie.  I think more than ever, these basic Mama-Needs are even more important!  
  • I pump at:  1:30 AM, 7:30 AM, 10:30 AM, 1:30 PM, 4:30 PM, 7:30 PM, 10:30 PM.  
I know I am not supposed to from 1:30 - 7:30 without pumping, but I just can't do it.  I cannot function without that bit of sleep.  It is not recommended going this long without pumping, but this is what I have found works for me.  If I don't get this chunk of sleep, then I am non-functional and NOTHING gets done.  And because I cannot wake myself up at 1:30 AM, I usually stay up...  That is when I watch ABC family shows on Hulu.  I am embarrassed about this...  I watch The Secret Life of the American Teenager at 2 AM.  (I hang my head in shame.) HAhAhha!!!!

Moving right along... What else do you need to know.

  • Don't lay down and pump.  You will fall asleep.  At 2 PM.  Or 2 AM.  You WILL fall asleep.  You will spill your hard earned milk.  You WILL ruin your pump this way, too.
  • Get on a schedule IMMEDIATELY.  It just makes things easier on you.  And your partner.... 
  • Don't obsess the way I did about sterilizing.  If you sterilize your pump parts, and don't use them  in the next 20 seconds, YOUR BABY WILL BE FINE.  I was scalding my fingers as I was so paranoid about sterilization... It's OK to relax.  Keep it clean, but don't hurt yourself...  (I really wish someone had told me this in the first place...)
  • After each use, I wash all parts with hot water, my Baby Only sponge, and regular dish soap.  Then I sterilize in the Medela microwave bags, then I lay out on my clean plate to air dry.  
I guess these parts are technically sterile after they air dry for two hours until the next pumping session, but after I blew the motor of one pump, spoke to Medela, etc, I realized what the issue was:  me.  Again, this is what works for me... I am no doctor, nurse, representative for Medela, etc...
  • Sterilize your pump tubes once a day.  I do it after my 1:30 AM pumping session, to give them a few hours to finish drying.  
Condensation will build up inside the pump tube.  If this harmless water gets sucked into your pump, IT WILL BE RUINED.  Or at minimum, it will never work the same... The lowest settings (for those sensitive nippies, especially in the first days) will never be the same...  BE CAREFUL!

  • Write it all down.  
I cannot stress this enough.  It will become a source of pride, to see how little you pumped in the beginning, and to how great you are a month later.  I also take notes like "BAD!"  When I went too long not pumping, how much water I drink (about 2 L a day... should be three!!), things like that.  If I could do it all over again, I would leave more space each day to write daily notes.  

I read in one of my preemie books that 10 days after birth, you should be producing about 600 ml of milk each day.  When I read that about a month ago, I PANICKED.  Not that sweet baby Valentina is consuming anywhere near that quite yet, the fact that I was only producing 150- 200 ml a day at that point, I really felt like I wasn't doing enough.  And I know that I wasn't really committing myself as much as I could be.  At that point (early June), I was pumping 4 to 5 times a day, sometimes 6.  That's kinda a lie... Maybe once a week I pumped 6 times a day... Now, looking at my Milk Journal, I can say I DEFINITELY pump 5 to 6 times a day, though my goal for next week is to be able to say I pump 6 to 7 times a week and drink 2- 2.5 liters of water a day.  That is two and a half Nalgenes a day.  That is a lot of bathroom trips. 

As a result of my super-efforts, I am now producing about 450 ml of milk a day!  

  • Drink the water.  Don't "sorta" drink the recommended 3L of water.  Do it. I am drinking about 2L a day.  If I drink less, I can actually see the numbers of precious milliliters of milk decrease.
  • Take your vitamins. 
  • Milk supplements?  I am taking Promil twice a day.  More about this in future posts.

Promil Milk Supplement
This is the one that was recommended to me by the NICU
I kinda like the taste too...

My parting thoughts:  Pumping for a preemie still in the hospital will feel like it is taking over your life.  I have mountains of laundry to do.  I am exhausted.  I am hungry ALL the time.  I get super grouchy.  When I pump the scheduled two to three times when I am at the hospital in the 7 to 8 hours I average there a day, I am taking away 1.5 hours of BaBy TiME.  There are days when I feel like I didn't get to see Valentina at the hospital, because I spent the whole time pumping.  (This probably isn't true, but it feels that way.)  And there are definitely days where I feel jealous of Victor, as he gets to Kangaroo hold baby, while I have to go pump.  Again.  

And it's not just 20 minutes pump and go!  You have to set up, pump, record, clean, put away.  Then you will have to pee, stretch, eat and chug more water.  Pumping for 20 minutes is about a 30 to 40 minute production.  I need to time each hour of my life.  I still haven't gotten that mani/ pedi.  Poor Victor hasn't had too many home cooked meals... though things are FINALLY balancing out better these days.  Two days ago, I even baked for the first time in THREE MONTHS!!!  (Chocolate Chip Zucchini Bread recipe later!)  I won't even GO into my lack-of-exercise- schedule...  But I AM signing up for a half marathon at the end of September, so  Monday morning:  IT IS ON.  

I am so unreliably proud of myself that I have stuck with it.  There are still times when I look at my watch, or hear my phone alarm go off, "it's time to pump.  Again."  And I start to cry.  (Sniffle, moan, grown, tear up a little, etc...)  It can be really, truly frustrating, that it is time to pump.  Again.   I f I start to cry at pump time, it's mostly just because I want sympathy and loving acknowledgement and encouragement from Vic.  And he gives me my much needed/ deserved hugs & kisses, and I go off to my "office" to pump, satisfied.  And sometimes, he brings me ice cream. (Extra husband points for this.)    


Pump parts.  *sigh.*



This is driving me crazy that this photo is sideways... 
But I write down the TIME that correlates to each time I use the sterilizing bag, that way, in case if
I forget to mark off the number at 2 AM, its a-OK.  And it helps keep track of how often I 
sterilize the pumping tubes.  


Pumping.  It takes over your life AND your kitchen. 


The baby cupboard.  



This is where I spend A LOT of time.......

And here is some notes from my Milk Diary... I can't believe I just called it that.... HAhhahah 



It really wasn't an option for me, to quit.  Not once did I think that I didn't want to do this anymore, that I should have just gone with formula etc.  There has been no "damage" to my breasts so far, no sagging, etc.  I obsessively put Mustela booby cream on, and I use about four different lotions post-shower (also takes up LOTS of time) but it is worth it.  Plus, I told Vic right from the start... I hope to breast feed all of our babies.  And once we are done having kids, for my (approximate) 40th birthday, I would like the best boob-job money can buy.  Just to put everything back where God intended.  That way we are BOTH happy.  (If it is necessary, of course... ) HA!!

Having a huge support system (and an incredible husband) is really important.  I have constantly reached out to family and friends about pumping, breastfeeding etc on numerous occasions, and while everyone pretty much says something different, all you can do is factor it all in, and slowly but surely, figure out what works for you.  I have actually pumped TWICE since I started this post, and I am FAMISHED and LATE to run off to the hospital today, so I must RUN.

One last little photo of baby last night, before I left... Oh how I am in love!! <3

Just after a HUGE diaper change, she was waiting for her milk... Not too thrilled...

    
All snuggled in for the night.... <3 <3 <3          

Oh sweet Valentina Lee...

*grow.baby.grow.*
      

1 comment:

  1. It gets easier! I pumped at work for over a year, 3-4 times a day every day. Baby is more efficient than the pump, so breastfeeding will be a breeze for you! And when she gets a bit older, if you are still pumping at times, you won't have to worry so much about sterilization. Heck, I'd just wipe out all the parts and put them into the fridge between pumps at work without even rinsing, and then sterilize at night (the 'fridge trick' lol). Hang in there, you are doing great!

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